What’s that Buzz?

First, you check the TV, peering at it, tugging at wires.

"Can you believe this, the ubiquitous buzzing of vuvuzelas has got the bees building a hive on our TV!"

Nothing.

That sound – that prolonged, incessant, monotonous, intrusive sound, like a mega size beehive on a rampage – is everywhere.

You shake the remote; press all those unexplained buttons.

Again – nothing.

Meanwhile, the rest of your group, disapproving of your general jumpiness, tell you to stop fidgeting.

“That sound,” you snap, “I think the TV’s going.”

“The TV’s fine.” They inform you, “It’s the vuvuzelas...”

“Eh?”

“Vuvuzela.”

“Woo-woo...?”

“No – vu-vu. The ‘V’ sound is distinct from the ‘W’...”

You stop the phonetics lesson with a gesture.

You need solutions – if this doesn’t stop, you’re going to collapse in tears, and bite the furniture.

“It’s like a trumpet,” someone explains. “They blow it nonstop during football matches.”

“Nonstop?”

“Nonstop.”

Hmmm – not good.

Especially when ‘watching-it-on-mute’ isn’t popular.

Consolation?

You’re not alone. Worldover, people are protesting, describing the noise variously as a “herd of elephants”, “a swarm of locusts”, etc.

But the vuvuzela, a cultural symbol for so many, goes on.

Maybe, humans and vuvuzelas can come to an understanding.

Take turns; give the old ears a break...?

After all, there’s nothing like the roar of a sport-loving crowd in full throttle, right?