The wheels of TANGEDCO

The mills of God, so The Man from Madras Musings is informed, grind slowly but they grind exceeding small. There are some who have expressed the same view about our judicial system, but MMM does not want to get into that controversy. He would, however, like to add a third institution that works the same way and that is our own Tamil Nadu Electricity Board which, for some strange reason, now goes about under an alias – TANGEDCO.

The divine mills were brought rather forcefully to MMM’s mind when he was driving down a thoroughfare that is his regular beat. In the past, this was a tree-lined avenue with discreet bungalows tucked away on either side. Since then the trees have come down, while the houses have grown taller and taller and now appear to be tumbling on to the road. What was once a four-lane road is now just two lanes thanks to the number of cars parked on the sides as the buildings inside have no space for them.

All would have still been well had not TANGEDCO muscled in one day to relay cables. That at least was the official reason given out, though it is MMM’s view that this body digs roads just for the fun of it, rather like a British Prime Minister of yore who cut down trees for exercise. To be fair to TANGEDCO, they did give sufficient warning. Enormous steel bobbins, each around 15 feet in diameter, and all of them having electric cables wound around them, were suddenly rolled in and randomly distributed all along the road. They remained there for days on end and the residents of the area soon came to consider them local scenery. Posters were pasted on them, children played around them, and men in urgent need of a tipple or two went behind them. Those wanting to answer calls of nature were more open and used the bobbins as convenient props.

There came a day when TANGEDCO decided that it had aired the cables long enough and they could now be pushed underground. The activity began one night, long after everyone had gone to bed. The next morning the locals found the entire road dug up along the sides. No car could enter or leave any building. Some alert watchmen on duty had hastily erected pedestrian walkways of sorts. But to ford these you had to be in prime physical condition and also a trained acrobat, as they were nothing more than a pole or two. Walking on them was a tough act and beneath was a yawning chasm. One false step and you joined the cables below.

As MMM drove by he noticed considerable action on the road. The secretaries of the various residents’ associations were in confabulation with TANGEDCO officials. They wanted to know as to how long they would need to be confined indoors. To this there was no answer. It was most likely that the man in charge of laying cables was not the appropriate authority to reply to such queries. Work proceeded sporadically thereafter. Every aspect of the cable laying was manual to the extreme – the bobbins had to be rolled, the cables unwound and laid, the roads dug and filled in. An army of labourers toiled when they felt like doing it, doing which was seldom, and the work continued for days. The residents took to using public transport and those who could stay indoors did so.

Then came a day when the work was over. True, the road was in a pitiable state, full of mounds and depressions but at least the cars could be taken out. Everyone heaved a sigh of relief. But the jubilation did not last long. A couple of days later, a group of men from the Chennai Metro Water and Sewerage Board were seen prospecting the area. MMM predicts more action.

Much ado over a wall

Heritage never had it so good. Hundreds of beautiful buildings, each a work of art, have fallen by the wayside and not one press reporter bothered. But every one of them is deeply concerned about the demolition and replacement with identical design of the compound wall along the Marina. And they have all been calling up The Man from Madras Musings.

Is it not shocking, asked one bright thing, that the Government had decided to demolish the wall? MMM remonstrated that it was after all a wall and the Government had begun the process a year ago. What was more, it was replacing the old design with an identical new one and so MMM did not consider this a matter of concern. The voice at the other end was clearly disappointed. It had called MMM to get a byte condemning the whole rebuilding and here was MMM preparing to toady to the Government. The voice went dead.

The next call was from another bright young thing, which had clearly done some homework, by way of collecting hearsay. The compound wall was built by the Nawabs of Arcot, it declared, and given that background it said that it wanted a statement from MMM to the effect that the Government was destroying our past. MMM disagreed and said that the compound was not built by the Nawabs and it was of later provenance. To this the voice disagreed and said that it had sources that said that the wall was over three hundred years old. MMM then asked as to why those sources were not speaking up against the demolition. To this the voice remained silent.

A third one was the best. It was a TV crew who made out that they were doing MMM a favour by inviting him to air his views. They also did not listen to anything that MMM said, interrupting continuously with a hiss and a series of okays that went like this – ssssss yah okokokokkkkkk. MMM, when he could get a word in between, flatly refused to come to the studios to lament over the compound wall. The voice, having hissed and okayed, then sought to give the story a positive twist. It asked if MMM would give a statement supporting the University of Madras whose Syndicate had refused to give permission for the demolition of their wall as part of the same replacement exercise. To this MMM countered stating that  the University could not claim to be a protector of heritage as its own Senate House has remained locked and is once again being neglected after an expensive restoration exercise. “Senate House? Is  that a Roman ruin in our  city?” asked the reporter. It was MMM’s turn to hang up.

Tailpiece

The above story does not end there. Yet another TV studio called up The Man from Madras Musings. When he firmly refused to be interviewed, the caller asked MMM if he would, instead, consent to speak on the Land Acquisition Bill. When MMM said he knew nothing on the subject, the voice said that did not matter as all that the TV channel needed was someone who could speak loudly.

-MMM