A little bit of medical humour

Dr. Krishnamoorthy Srinivas, well known for injecting a joke or a bit of humour into every conversation you have with him or in his speeches, offers this little bit of medical humour:

Apparently the American Medical Association has weighed in on the new economic stimulus package...

The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the Adminstration had a lot of nerve.

The Obstetricians felt they were all labouring under a misconception.

Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.

Pathologists yelled, ‘Over my dead body’, while the Paediatricians said, ‘Oh, grow up!’

The Podiatrists thought it was a big step backward, and the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.

The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it.

Surgeons decided to wash their hands off the whole thing.

The Internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the Plastic Surgeons said, ‘This puts a whole new face on the matter.’

The Anaesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and the Cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say ‘no’.

In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes in Washington.

Editor’s Note: Pardon the language.

Mesopotamian links

Migration and reverse migration have taken place during pre-history (MM, October 16th).

In ancient times, Mother Goddess was the principal deity, similar to our Mariamman, in the Mesopotamian region. There were several ammans with different names and with different powers and the people offered prayers for fulfilling their wishes as is done at present in India. These idols were of black granite. One of these idols was taken to Europe and installed in a church and was called the Black Virgin (Vierge Noire in French).

People offered prayers in front of gopuram-like structures called ‘ziggourat’. In Iraq, bakeries make cakes in shapes similar to ziggourats.

They also offered idols of shapes similar to clay idols we offer in India, to ammans to fulfil vows. Thousands of idols have been found in and around the ‘Eye Temple’ at Tell Brak, dating to the late Uruk period.

The Devanga caste’s procession at the festival of Chowdeswari Amman is similar to the Moharram processions taken out by Shia Muslims.

One of the ancient cities of Mesopotamia is ‘Nagar’. Perhaps the ancestors of Nagarathar community migrated from Mesopotamia. Similarly, family names also indicate the migration of some castes from the Mesopotamian region.

The traditional jewellery of Kurdish women is similar to that of Indian women. For example, they wear nose-studs.

Archaeologists conducting investigations in the Mesopotamian region believe that the Sumerians could have been migrants from an unknown country.

This is additional information to supplement reader K.V.S. Krishna’ contribution.

S.N. Mahalingam
64-A, Kalamegam Street Extn.
SBI Colony II Street
Kamarajapuram,
Chennai 600 073

Debate required

It is indeed odd that the Supreme Court should sit in judgement over issues of ethno-science or anthropology (MM, October 16th). Irrespective of the merits of their pronouncement and in the light of opinions expressed by reader K.V.S. Krishna, the following aspects of the question require to be debated.

• The Vice-President of our Republic has recently travelled all the way to Turkey to visit the shrine of his ancestors, whereas a Kurumba in the wild domains of the Nilgiris can make it within a day to go and venerate the ‘spirit stones’ of his ancestors deposited inside a dolmen in his backwoods. Who is really indigenous or who is actually an immigrant thus remains an interesting query. Moreover, what contourises ‘immigration’ – political boundaries or history of invasions, or once nomadic and later sedentary influx of populations, or transmission of culture?
• It has been observed that the grammar of Australian aboriginal languages and that of Tamil are similar. But the linguistic pattern of phoneme usage (and its inter-disciplinary genetic effect) obtained between these forms of speech can scarcely cause any such grammatical homogeneity.
• The primordial ancestor of PNG and Dravidian macro-groups of languages cannot be reconstructed with the help of a 2010 telephone directory or the Archaeological Department of Tamil Nadu! Competent prior review demands more rigorous exercises.
• Experts believe it is hard to say anything definitive about languages prior to 8000 years ago. So, to claim that the discovery of any proto-language 80,000 years old is possible, can only be an untenable thesis.
• Latest scientific findings imply that several variants of modern human language could have emerged somewhat independently in different locations rather than solely in Africa (Science, Vol.332: 15 April 2011). Evidence for anatomically modern Homo sapiens has also been found at Qafzeh in Israel.
• Coming to Adivasis – whether we label them so or as indigenous people – they should be allowed to determine their own identity and it should not be pontificated upon either by any government or by non-governmental agencies. The ‘mainstream mandate’ others seek to foist upon these ancient segments of pre-literate population should not be at the cost of their livelihood rights, territory-wise and otherwise.

Rev. Philip Mulley
St.John’s Church
Coonoor, The Nilgiris